Happy Father’s Day, Ted. You are a wonderful, wonderful daddy, and a wonderful, wonderful husband. Lilith and I are blessed to have you. Thank you for always playing dress up, drinking innumerable cups of invisible tea, and laying in the dirt on command when Lilith asks you to pretend to be Lightly Drowned Prince Eric. Thank you for taking care of us when we’re sick, and hugging us when we’re blue. Thank you for always being there when we need you, and for always being patient, kind, funny, and compassionate. Thank you for everything you are and everything you do. You make your womenfolk happier than you can imagine. We love you.

At midnight, I was kissing my husband. Cannot imagine a better way to start the year.

The Little Red Love Jar: A Honey Spell
Use this little cutie to sweeten someone up. It is a gentle yet firm method of spellwork used to draw someone’s love to you. These honey jars contain locally-harvested orange blossom honey, red rose petals from the TAL garden, home-crafted rose water, minerals geared for attraction and sexual union, and Venus-governed essential oils that are first distillations from small farms.

There are many methods of personalizing this jar that include:

• adding soil from both of your footprints
• tying a strand of your hair with his / her hair and adding it to the jar
• adding drops of your blood and your potential mate’s blood
• adding semen / vaginal lubrication from yourself and your potential mate
• writing out your specific intent in red ink on parchment that has not been cut by scissors

Do what you feel comfortable doing. However you choose to personalize the spell, please make sure you include your name (written three times) crossed with your intended’s name (written three times). Write the names on white or ‘parchment’ paper in red ink.

Do this work every Friday during the hour of Venus until the working comes to fruition. Before starting the work, take a teaspoon of honey (NOT the honey from this jar), and eat it slowly, focusing on your intent and focusing on the sweetness and headiness of the honey itself. After you take the honey, burn a tiny red candle dressed with an appropriate oil for your working (Blessing of Isis, Caliph’s Beloved, Dixie Love Perfume, Lord of the Forest, Q5, Q7, Siren, and Blinding Glory of Love are all currently available on the Twilight Alchemy Lab site) on top of the jar. While the candle is burning, continue to focus your intent. Once the working is complete, bury the jar and all the wax leavings in your yard.

This honey jar spell can also be used to tighten bonds that are already in place, and to rekindle love between people that have drifted apart.

Do not eat this honey. Please. Zomgplease. These tiny jars contain iron filings and lodestones which are not particularly awesome for your digestion. /understatement

This is a romantic Venus-oriented wash. It brings romance and peace through love. Use Love and Affection wash in your home to draw in love, create an atmosphere of sweetness, kindness, and affection, and to sweeten the temperaments of the home’s inhabitants.

Our products are created with the utmost respect for the environment, and this includes our floorwashes. Twilight Alchemy Lab’s Love and Affection Floorwash was created with certified fair trade pure castile soap as its base. The herbs within the floorwash are organically-grown and pesticide-free, and the oils within the wash are all first distillations from small farms. This floorwash is heavy on the essential oils: over 5ml of uncut, undiluted oil was used in the mix. As with all of our products — a little goes a long way. The rose petals within the wash come directly from the TAL garden.

Add one to three teaspoons of Love and Affection to each gallon of wash water. At dawn or dusk, wash the floors and doorways of your home from the perimeter inward. “Drawing In” floorwashes don’t need to be as thorough as their purification and cleansing counterparts: you can broom-dust with the floorwash lightly if you don’t feel that you need an exhaustive washing. With this wash, always work from the outside pulling /in/.

Because I’m classy like that, I’m just going to tell it like it is: this incense is made for fucking. I don’t even want to use a cutesy word there because ‘fucking’ really is the only one that fits. There’s no romance here, no flowers and candy; this is raw, shameless, bestial bacchanal maenad/satyr sex in a jar. Use it in rituals to increase your libido, to spark and rekindle sexual attraction, to strengthen sexual bonds, and when you just really want to get laid. Outside of ritual work, this incense can be burned in the bedroom to create a tremendously passionate atmosphere.

There is a very strong Earth-Mars influence in this blend. It was created under precise ritual circumstances to further increase the strength of the blend. Only five have been created due to the immense amount of energy it takes to create this incense correctly. (I kept one for myself. Heh.)

Twilight Alchemy Lab’s Arousal 7 incense contains herbs that are organically-grown and pesticide-free, and the oils within the incense are all first distillations from small farms. Several of the components of this incense were grown in the TAL garden.

Carnations from the TAL garden. It corresponds to Sol and used in works of protection, love, pleasure, joy, friendship, healing, and strength.

I don’t remember the last time I was ever that moved. I love my friends.